Another Valentine Day is upon us. Many know that the holiday is named after
Saint Valentine, but who was Saint Valentine? 
One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the
third century
in Rome.
When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than
those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men -- his crop
of potential soldiers. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied
Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When
Valentine's actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to
death. Other stories suggest that
Valentine may have been killed for attempting to help Christians escape harsh
Roman prisons where they were often beaten and torture. According to another legend, Valentine
actually sent the first 'valentine' greeting himself. While in prison, it is
believed that Valentine fell in love with a young girl -- who may have been his
jailor's daughter -- who visited him during his confinement. Before his death,
it is alleged that he wrote her a letter, which he signed 'From your
Valentine,' an expression that is still in use today. So as you can see, there are many legends
surrounding Saint Valentine. We may
never know which one is true, but we can know it had something to do with
enduring love.
Considering enduring love, I am reminded of 1 John 3:1-2, 1 John 4:7-12
See, take notice, consider, look by faith, with wonder and astonishment, and
observe how great a favour, what an instance of matchless love, what a
wonderful blessing of grace,
the Father
hath bestowed upon us:
the Father of Christ, and the Father of us in Christ, who hath adopted us into
his family, and regenerated us by his grace, and hath freely given us the new
name:
that we should
be called the sons of God.
Not just a mere title, but the very thing (Galatians 4, Romans 8:16-17 talks
about our heir ship with Christ)
This thing
called love: what manner of love is it? Let’s break it down and talk about love.
We use the word
“love” very loosely, I love chocolate, I love to travel, I love that car, I
love my job, etc.
There are three Greek
words for love found in the Bible: eros, phileo, and agapao
Eros is generally
known as physical love, Phileo is brotherly love, Agape is generally known as
divine love
Another way of saying it is to ask whether you “Love Because” (you met some need or someone met a need for you), you “Love If”(your love is predicated upon something or someone doing something for you, if you do something for me) or do you “Love period” (you don’t have to do anything, perform, change, I love you period just as you are).
Fortunate for us, God loves us period. There may be things that need to change, but God saw beyond your human frailty and embraces you just as you are, seeing beyond the flesh and seeing your heart. It’s the heart that matters.
Again, what
manner of love is this:
Words cannot do
justice to explain God’s love for us, but it can be described by the following
characteristics:
Affection (God covers us, he protects us, he wants the
best for us), communion with the Holy Spirit
Passion (meaning fervor, enthusiasm, zeal, obsession)
– Jesus’ passion for us is to know him, fellowship with him, and tell others
about this love
Commitment (I will never leave you nor forsake you,
behold, I am with you always (Matthew 28:20), I have come so that
you may have life and life abundantly (that’s God’s commitment to us)
Self-sacrifice (while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us – he didn’t have to, but
he did, why – it’s all about love) Jesus
said, you didn’t chose me, I chose you
Given the
above, how should we love then (in our covenant relationships, friendships,
associates, etc.)?
With love being one
of the fruit of the Spirit, it is something that is developed over time: For this John exhorts us to love others, be
concerned about them, and to seek their welfare. John is not talk about a feeling, Love is not
an emotion, it effects emotion, but a decision and disposition. John teaches three things on the why of love:
Love is the very
nature of God (vs 7-10)
Because God loved
us, we have experienced His love, forgiveness, and help and are indebted to
others to show that love as well (v 11)
Love is perfected in
us as we love others (v 12)
I want to give 10
practical love commandments - The Lifestyle of Love (for both covenant couples
and friendships)
Thou Shalt
communicate with each other
Thou shalt comprise
when things cannot be changed
Thou shalt never
take each other for granted
Thou shalt keep
romance alive in your relationship
Thou shalt arrange
to spend time together
Thou shalt not let
money come between you
Thou shalt show each
other respect and consideration
Thou shalt show thy
appreciation for each other
Thou shalt earn each
other’s trust
Thou shalt endeavor
to be friends as well as lovers
Within the GLBTQ communities, Covenant Relationship
takes work, it’s not all glamorous –it’s dirty/messy at times, consider the
following obstacles:
Opposition from family, peer pressure, most organized religions, little support from the GLBT communities at large, not convinced that the GLBTQ relationships last, immaturity on the part of some to commitment, stability, and maturity, the general acceptance of relationship breakup as the normal natural way of solving problems (my suggestion is that your response be: “leaving is not an option”; the unrealistic expectation that a relationship will bring constant and lasting happiness all of the time, that a relationship will solve all of one’s personal problems, the acceptance of that the grass is not greener (which is almost always not the case), stress stemming from longevity in a relationship, isolation, guilt feelings due to the failure to accept one’s sexual orientation, the lack of self-esteem, and financial problems,
As you can see, there are many obstacles, but the obstacles can be and have been conquered by thousands of happy GLBTQ persons. It’s knowing the obstacles and being with someone who know them and committed to you and the relationship. Jesus is our example of someone committed to a relationship, no matter what the obstacle is – even to death. That’s love my brothers and sisters.
I leave you with these five thoughts:
1. “Relationship isn’t so much finding the right person as being the right person”
2. Amos 3:3: Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so
3. It is the love of God that compels us 2 Cor 5:14
4. Love one another as I have love you so you must love one another (John 13:34)
5. Labor prompted by
love 1 Thess 1:3 
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